I Wish I Wish
by Robert Hayden
Sundays too my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.
I'd wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking.
When the rooms were warm, he'd call,
and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house,
speaking indifferently to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.
What did I know, what did I know
of love's austere and lonely offices?
------------------------------------------------------
Rmb that time when I say I’ll write a post on father. I’ve decided not to but this poem gives me the urge to write it.
Father-someone who work so hard but receive nothing in return.
“No one ever thanked him”
Instead, someone blamed him for not understanding her well enough.
In fact, she’s the one who doesn’t understand everybody.
Why do people always assume that the speaker is a son. Dun u people know that daughters long for that intimate relationship with their fathers too?
My father left me for 7yrs n came back for another 7yrs before he’s gone again. We both know that this barrier between may take forever for us to overcome. I blamed him last time. When im not mature enough to put myself into his shoes, knowing that he longs for a more intimate relationship with me, or rather with his children. Now I know. I know he is longing for that. I understand that feeling of not being appreciated by the people u work so hard for.
I know he loves me. I learn to see it in the perspective of an adult, particularly a father. But I know he is not force to leave, he chooses to. So should I still forgive?
But whenever I think of the “lonely offices” and how he couldn’t even has a proper meal there, there’s this sense of guilt of wanting so much from him.
So much. Just a little more.
When I read that article about how father can affect children’s ability in math n etc, I sms him immediately. Am I trying to make him feel guilty? My sis n bro are super good at math n for me………HAHA.
Yea, so his reply was,” are u trying to tell me that I did not give u enough care or is always not with u”
I din dare to tell him “YES, that’s what I want to hear form u”
I changed the topic, trying to hide that anger.
All along I know he’s guilty. And im guilty of making him feel this way. He never hits me and he always apologies after every scolding n explain y he did this n that. Maybe it’s because of this I learn how to apologies. As in, im not afraid to. I know some people jus find so hard to say sorry.
I can see how much my father has changed over the yrs. Learning to control his temper and learning to adapt to changes in his children. It’s impossible to handle a 15yr old teenager like how u handle a 5yr old kid. There’s something to learn everyday, it dun stops from the moment u graduate from school. LOL
I Wish Upon a Star on Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Those Winter Sundays
by Robert Hayden
Sundays too my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.
I'd wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking.
When the rooms were warm, he'd call,
and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house,
speaking indifferently to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.
What did I know, what did I know
of love's austere and lonely offices?
------------------------------------------------------
Rmb that time when I say I’ll write a post on father. I’ve decided not to but this poem gives me the urge to write it.
Father-someone who work so hard but receive nothing in return.
“No one ever thanked him”
Instead, someone blamed him for not understanding her well enough.
In fact, she’s the one who doesn’t understand everybody.
Why do people always assume that the speaker is a son. Dun u people know that daughters long for that intimate relationship with their fathers too?
My father left me for 7yrs n came back for another 7yrs before he’s gone again. We both know that this barrier between may take forever for us to overcome. I blamed him last time. When im not mature enough to put myself into his shoes, knowing that he longs for a more intimate relationship with me, or rather with his children. Now I know. I know he is longing for that. I understand that feeling of not being appreciated by the people u work so hard for.
I know he loves me. I learn to see it in the perspective of an adult, particularly a father. But I know he is not force to leave, he chooses to. So should I still forgive?
But whenever I think of the “lonely offices” and how he couldn’t even has a proper meal there, there’s this sense of guilt of wanting so much from him.
So much. Just a little more.
When I read that article about how father can affect children’s ability in math n etc, I sms him immediately. Am I trying to make him feel guilty? My sis n bro are super good at math n for me………HAHA.
Yea, so his reply was,” are u trying to tell me that I did not give u enough care or is always not with u”
I din dare to tell him “YES, that’s what I want to hear form u”
I changed the topic, trying to hide that anger.
All along I know he’s guilty. And im guilty of making him feel this way. He never hits me and he always apologies after every scolding n explain y he did this n that. Maybe it’s because of this I learn how to apologies. As in, im not afraid to. I know some people jus find so hard to say sorry.
I can see how much my father has changed over the yrs. Learning to control his temper and learning to adapt to changes in his children. It’s impossible to handle a 15yr old teenager like how u handle a 5yr old kid. There’s something to learn everyday, it dun stops from the moment u graduate from school. LOL
I Wish Upon a Star on Wednesday, May 09, 2007